12. “Feels Like Rain,” Buddy Guy & Bonnie Raitt

I think I’ve said before that I don’t really feel guilty about liking the music I like, and I think this blog has reflected that, with Richard Marx next to Living Colour. But this song does make me feel kind of guilty.

This song actually came up on shuffle about a week ago, but I wanted to save the blog for today because it’s 10/10 and it’s our 10th wedding anniversary. That’s a big ol’ bunch of binary beauty right there. And this song was our wedding song, our first dance song. That’s what I feel guilty about.

One of the things I loved about our wedding and the preparation for it, was that we chose all of the music together. There were some songs that were Carrie songs, some that were Kevin songs, others that were Carrie and Kevin songs. That was the easy part, the fun part. The hard part was deciding what our first dance song was going to be. Neither of us really had a slow enough song that we were passionate enough about to hold that lofty status. We didn’t have an “our song,” as many couples do, even though we both love music.

Still, we both came to each other with a couple of songs that we thought, maybe, could make the cut. And this one was the one I felt most passionate about among the choices. I’d always loved it. It always made me smile. And while, for some people, the notion of it feeling like rain is a negative thing, I knew Carrie loved rain and storms. So I thought it fit us.

But the guilt comes from getting my way. She certainly didn’t put up a fight and she seemed fine with it, and she didn’t really push hard for one of her choices. But I still kind of feel like she should’ve had one of her songs.

In the end, though, it’s totally a romantic song, about lasting love, no matter what kind of storms might come your way.

Ten years later, it’s pretty fitting. We’ve had our storms. But storms pass. A lot has happened, good and bad. We’ve had to endure a lot of the bad (infertility and the massive expense of it) to get the good (two amazing little boys). Sure, we’ve been battered and bruised by the bricks thrown by the storm. But we’re still here. The bruises are battle scars. We still have fun together. We still love each other. And the fruit of it all, as if grown and ripened by the rain, are those little boys that rock our worlds.

So maybe I shouldn’t feel so guilty. In retrospect, the song fits us. It is us.

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